Garden Envy

Last fall my family and I moved to the suburbs and as it was fall, we enjoyed the turning autumn foliage and did not give the landscaping much thought.  This spring, I was in a mood to plant some new things so at Costco picked up an assortment bag of deer-resistant plants and some peony cuttings.

(Let's preface that I'm an inner-city girl through and through.  The only green I grew up with were the trees on the sidewalk and an occasional trip to a concrete playground.  I kill plants like it's my life mission.  The plant below was given as a housewarming present by a relative.   See all the dried leaves and flowers? I don't even know what this plant is.  Am I supposed to water this thing?  Good thing butterflies don't care how I take care of plants.)

I Kill Things:
Bet you didn't know beauty bloggers are cold hearted killers.
Water it?  What?
Bad things happened.  First of all, after planting, I kept no record of what the plants were and I didn't mark where I planted.  As the days got warmer and adorable little sproutlings came up, I had no idea if they were weeds or what I planted!

Weed or What I Planted?!  Or is it stuff the previous homeowner planted?!

Are clovers weeds?  Anyway: CUTE.

Adding more insult to more injury, the peonies I've planted are sort of going all dead-like.  Most of them.

See, DEAD.

Poison Ivy?
And then things that look suspiciously like poison ivy all over the place!

And look at my sad lilac bush.  It made two bunches of flower and then went like this:

Garden Envy:
Heaping even more insult to injury, my next door neighbor has the most glorious gardens and landscaping.  What's her secret?  She's a retired botanist.  Time to switch Belly career to botany.

Can you help me identify the weeds?  Help me?

Calla Lily - Woe Is Me & Soju Tipsy

Chanel Stylo Eyeshadow in Jade Shore vs. Rouge Bunny Rouge Long Lasting Eye Shadow in Periwinkle Cardinal